Giving Natural Birth V.S Caesarean section

Before my daughter was born I read everything I could find on the market about pregnancy, breastfeeding and giving birth,as probably most other first-time-moms do. After always believing in life and that nature knows what is best and after reading all the information available, I decided to do everything possible to make sure that I'll deliver natural, without drug medication or interventions and breastfeed my baby for 12 months.

The downside of most painkillers are that they cross the placenta and effect the baby, while others cause a 'cascade' of interventions, making episiotomy, assisted delivery or Caesarean section more likely, made me even stronger believe in my decision. Apart from pain relief in the form of gas and air, it's also difficult to combine with an active birth, and that I wanted to do for sure, GIVING ACTIVE BIRTH. So clearly I wanted to avoid all of this, which could by any chance disrupt me achieving my goal. I wanted the REAL THING, the fully natural powered feeling!

I read about research done about intervention during labour and the much higher risk of distress for mother and baby or both, and about the importance of a perfect bonding time for the future relationship between us two. I always thought I want my baby to get the very best I can possibly give, no matter what I have to do for it! I also did not want my baby to be stressed or "high" and risking to have a bad bonding experience, because the bonding after birth could also play a significant role in the success or failure of breastfeeding your baby successfully right from the beginning, as the baby might be too drowsy or weak and reluctant to feed.

For me it just didn't make sense to look out for a healthy diet, not to drink alcohol or coffee during my pregnancy, (I don't smoke anyway), but to risk to stress my baby and myself because of drug medication during labour. A bonding problem right after birth might also be caused for example by the mother who is too weak, narcotised, or too much in pain from her C-section. Well,this would definitely NOT have been an option for me. First of all, I don't live in Hollywood;-). Secondly it's major surgery and that I would never ever do out of free will. A women is two to four times more likely to die during a Caesarean than a vaginal birth, not to mention the longer recovering time. I mean they basically cut you open, remove your insides to get the baby out and literally put your uterus on your stomach and then put it back in. I know that a lot of lives have been saved this way and I am glad for all these moms and baby's, but that doesn't make the nowadays routine medical approach most South Africans are accustomed to today-during which the doctor mostly does what suits him,his wallet and his schedule best, acceptable for me. I am liberal towards a lot of things, but just don't have any understanding for an elective Caesarean if it is not a result of known medical problem, such as placenta praevia, a breech baby or multiple birth. And even lots of these babies could be born without it, if the medical approach would be different from the beginning. Research has shown higher risks of a lot of health issues later on in life i.e. breathing difficulties for baby, or infections of womb,bladder and chest of the mother not to mention the possible psychological problems with both; the mother not feeling good enough about not giving birth naturally and having depressions(much more likely after C-section), or the baby not having the elementary experience of life, fighting his way into his world and not being totally unexpected lifted out! Natural birth and normal labour releases huge amounts  of painkilling endorphins and best of all: Oxytocin! That is your biggest "birthing buddy".

You get the highest amount of Oxytocin in your life during normal labour and birth and it is the same hormone what makes you feel so great when you have an orgasm. But unfortunately ;-) there you get only tiny amounts compare to what you get during total normal birth. The emotional connection between you and your baby is for that  reason so much higher than if you deliver "unnatural". That's why you feel so much more that you have the GREATEST GIFT EVER in your arms after birth. I really think it wasn't sooo bad to go without medication, or other interventions and I am not braver than most of you and I definitely do not like pain. But I do wanted to give my baby and me the best possible start for our relationship and the most perfect bonding time we could possibly have. The most best possible start nature intended us to have between mother and child. 

Then my labour started:  I was in Germany and we were watching the FIFA soccer final 2006 and my baby (over a week overdue) was not going to be born during the final, a lot of people were joking about this before. Well, I went to bed with some big towels on the mattress (trying to get some rest,as the books said) and waiting for my water to break (funny,hey?). That was about 10pm. I didn't sleep the whole night,but because I am a nice girl ;-) I let my husband have his peace. The next morning we drove to my best friends house to drop of my dog, as we wanted to drive to the hospital soon.

We thought after a whole night of strong 'feelings' in my abdomen and then even stronger ones, that I must be very close to giving birth soon. My friend, mother of a twelve year old amazing boy (also born totally natural) convinced me to have a cup of tea and to "chill out", that's what she said. So after having tea and a chat;we even have pictures of me kneeling on their couch, all of us laughing (that was just after one contraction passed away). We drove to the hospital about 12pm. It was a shock to me, when the nurse said that I was only 1cm dilated. I mean I thought I could do this without medication, I thought the contractions are very strong already and only 1cm? Now I knew I am a weak little big mouth. I mean if I was only 1cm dilated, what would I feel at 10cm? 10 times more pain? I thought: OK, don't think further, you are going to do this and you are not going to die from pain. We drove home again, the nurse offered me to stay but I felt better in private. At 7pm we drove back after me having now 'really' strong contractions and again: Only 3cm dilated! I really thought the contractions in the morning where strong, ha, ha, now I laugh about it.

After some walks on the floor outside of the maternity room, I went for hours in the birth pool. The nurses joked with me, that they are going to put my enormous water and lavender oil usage as extra costs on the bill, as they were only running the water in and out. I was calm and very focused on breathing through my contractions. That helped me big time,I just breathed every single one away. The nurses where very impressed with my breathing skills and asked me, if I went to classes or if I do Yoga or something else, because it seemed to them, that I really knew what I am doing there. I couldn't stand any touch, my poor husband and also my best friend later weren't allowed to touch me during labour. At the first monitoring record in the morning the belt came loose because I was kneeling, that's why the partogram had a 'gap' with no signals of the baby. The nice doctor in the morning told me, that this is nothing to worry about, because the 'No signal of the baby' in the record is only due to the loose belt during kneeling. I wasn't worried about this at all, because I could definitely feel my baby moving. Unfortunately this nice lady went home by the evening and when I was about 8cm dilated this horrible doctor came in the room, asking about the progress. So the nurse showed him the records of my monitoring and told him that I am over 40 hours awake and that my contractions started over 24 hours ago. This doctor replied that I must not go through this, and by the time I would have to push, I would be probably too tired to do so, so he suggested the best I can do now is having a Caesarean. He even mentioned the gap in the monitoring from the morning and said that that is not a good sign at all. So after explaining him how that occurred and what the nice doctor (who was the chief doctor) said, you could see the disappointment in his face, of this  reason probably not working with me. I asked him if my baby is in danger. He denied,said everything is fine, but you never know what could happen. "Nice answer" I thought, exactly what I wished for!! I got soo angry with this idiot. I mean how dare he tried to make me scared. There are two groups of animals on the planet,those who run away when they think they are in danger and those who get aggressive and defend themselves. I've always been in the second group. That has been often an advantage in my life, but also sometimes fatal. I am sure most women would probably at this point be scared like me and opt for a Caesarean and say afterwards: "I really wanted to give natural birth,but unfortunately it was an emergency!" Don't get me wrong,I don't say that there are no women out there who REALLY needed a 'tummy cut'; and luckily we have these options. But it's just that almost every mother I was introduced to in SA did not deliver natural and almost all of them had an "emergency"or like I already mentioned, even worse in my eyes,a elective c-section. I wonder why? However,the Western world has seen a gradual return to home births within the last few decades and birthing at home is still very much the tradition within developing countries. Everything goes back to the roots, like it should be, in my eyes. In the Netherlands for example 30 % of all women have a home birth!

But know back to my case: "Dr. Frankenstein" still scaring me and explaining to me the "benefits" (are there REALLY any?) of a Caesarean section: "It would be all over soon, bla,bla,bla..." So I answered him, that if he doesn't stop mentioning a Caesarean, I am going to stand up and will let my husband drive me to the next hospital, where they'll accept my wish to deliver natural. The midwife just smiled,I am sure she didn't like him as well. He only said that this is fine, as it is my decision and left the room,slightly p..off. You must please understand that I clearly would have never risked my baby's life, but her heartbeat was perfect, she even had a nap while I was about 8cm dilated. Everything was fine, except of "Frankenstein's" wish to make some more money for the hospital or having one surgery more on his records. I am sure that my progress in opening up was so delayed, because I didn't want this Doctor to deliver my baby, as I said to the nurse and my husband: 'That no matter what, this guy will not touch me or my baby .'

So eventually about 10 pm my water broke (Frankenstein went home) and I called my friend to come to the hospital. She only lives 5minutes away. Main reason for her being there while I give birth was not only because we all wished so,because she is my best friend. Mainly because I wanted to make sure that nothing happens against what I think is right. She is German and I wanted to be assured that nothing happens to me or baby without my husband knowing. He is Afrikaans and wouldn't have been able to understand each single German word of the staffs conversation.

So when my princess 'crowned' it was sore, indeed. There I was loud, I remember clearly, but the doctor got her kit out and said she is going to do a episiotomy, as she thinks I am too exhausted to push it out without 'help'. I told her that the last contraction wasn't hard enough to push, that's why I breathed through it,but she thought I can't make it because I am to weak. Today I am sure that I could have done this also without her kit getting used, if they would have left me my time to do it, especially because my baby was fine! The body knows when to give you hard contractions to push, where you just can't do anything else, even if you wanted to, you just want to bear down. And even if you would have a spontaneous laceration, where in most cases only little tissues tear anyway. An episiotomy does the same damage as a second degree laceration. So it might be helpful to refuse to get an episiotomy done (I will do that for sure next time), as if you tear you have a good chance to have far less damage than from an episiotomy. Especially in the long run as research in England proved that you recover much faster from a spontaneous laceration, than from a episiotomy. You do also have less pain after a tear, when you are intimate again. An episiotomy is mostly done for the staffs sake and not for yours.

I found it irritating to get screamed at:"Puuush"; I mean please, I know when to push! The body will guide you, it's natural and instinctive. My little angel was born at 1.16 in the morning. With a double 10 APGAR score. She made this cute little noises,was totally alert and started sucking her fist immediately. After her examination they put her on my chest, so I could nurse her. That was the most wonderful, awesome moment in my life. My husband was so unbelievable cute, he lost his heart from the first second he saw her. Long after I was asleep he held her the whole night in his arms and could not take his eyes of her. I remember waking up from her little dreaming noises hours later and he was still holding her, not willing to put his precious miracle down in her bed. He just repeated over and over and to everybody: "She is soo beautiful"! From this day on I was not his favourite girl any more ;-). I would do at the birth of my second child everything exactly like I did with her,except of that I would go (if I would go at all) much later to the hospital. I did also nurse my beautiful girl for almost 15 months. That is something I would do also longer with my second baby. How this worked all out for me and how easy it was to get her "off" again I am telling you soon all about.

Helpful information you can find in the following book suggestions:
- Homebirth, Sheila Kitzinger, Penguin 
- A Good Birth, A Safe Birth, D. Korte & R. Scaer, Bantam Books 
- Heart & Hands: A Midwife's Guide to Pregnancy & Birth, Elizabeth Davis, John Muir Press
- Home Birth: A Practical Guide, Nicky Wesson, Pinter and Martin
- Immaculate Deception II: Myth, Magic & Birth, Suzanne Arms, Bergin & Garvey
- Instinctive Birthing,Val Clarke 
- Labor Pains: Modern Midwifes and Homebirth, D.Sullivan R. Weitz,Yale Press
- Mind over Labor: A Breakthrough Guide to Giving Birth, Carl Jones,Viking Penguin
- Special Delivery, Rahima Baldwin, Celestial Arts 

Further information under:
www.sheilakitzinger.com
www.aims.org.uk
www.babble.com
www.birthchoiceuk.com
www.gentlebirth.org
www.homebirth.org
 
Sorry, English is not my first language so forgive me any written mistakes.