Baby-wearing

Olga Lipkovics [18 May 2010] -

Baby-wearing is a mind-set.

You need to get ready to wear your baby. You need to get ready physically but most importantly you need to get ready emotionally.

You need to have an open mind to understand that wearing your baby is a hard work but it is something you do for your baby and it has long-term benefits.

Babies brain develops the following way: it takes pictures of everything. It means the more you involve your baby the more pictures she/he can take. They take the picture and they will remember it when they are in a similar situation, so they can adjust their actions based on the picture they have in their mind. For example, you are cooking something with your baby together. She/he will remember when she/he’s about to cook their own food one day.

Wearing your baby is much harder work than to drop your baby into a pram or into a cot for the day and just try to carry on with your life. In that way your baby will cry for you the whole day, and you will be so angry and frustrated, because your baby doesn't let you do anything. It is your choice. You can decide to let your baby cry and get yourself frustrated or you can decide to carry your baby on you so your baby won’t cry, she/he will be happy to be close to you and she/he will be able to take millions of pictures about what you do and remember it for good - you will be able to do everything during the course of the day what needs to be done.

How can you get ready physically?
It is the easy part. Get some exercise. I’m not saying you have to go to the gym and work out every single day for 4 hours, but prepare your body to carry 3-15 kg. The good news is that you get used to it while you are pregnant The even better news is you can put her/him down once she/he is out already what you couldn’t do while she/he was inside. So carry your baby on you is easier than to be 40 weeks pregnant 24/7 even if your baby is 9 months old and 10kg.

All you need to do is to walk as much as you can during your pregnancy and do yoga which will help to build some muscle next to your spine and on your arm.

How can you get ready emotionally?
Get rid of your fear of raising a child.
Stop thinking about what you are not able to do/give and start doing/giving what you can do/give for/to your baby! Keep it in your mind that in the first 2-3 years she/he doesn’t need anything else but you and your partner. Your caring love and constant presence is the only things she/he needs essentially, nothing else.

Start to listen to your basic instinct.
Start to do what you feel is right for your baby and for your family instead of listening to those advices everybody more than happy to give you. If you feel it is right to sleep next to your baby, do it. If you feel it is right to carry your baby on you whole day, do it. If you feel breastfeeding your baby up until she/he is 3 years old, do it! Do not hesitate! Start to do it now!

Stop showing off and start thinking about how nature works.
Most of the animals carry their babies on them until baby is ready to go on its own. If you listen to your basic instinct you will feel wearing your baby is natural. More natural than put her/him into a big cot what stands in the middle of the nicely designed nursery room [which is far enough from your room so you can't hear her/his crying] and you spent hell of a lot of money and effort on it so it would look nice on the pictures. I think leave your newborn baby alone separated from you in the nursery room is something similar to leave you alone in the middle of nowhere without any connection to anyone who speaks your language. Imagine this and add to it that your baby is not even able to speak yet.

Get rid of your fear of spoiling your child.
If you think you’ll spoil your baby by wearing her/him on you, you are just not ready yet. You can never spoil a child with love, hugs, strokes, and kisses. You only can spoil a baby if you want to compensate her with expensive toys and accessories for those moments when you didn’t show your love to her / you didn’t pick her up when she cried / you didn’t kiss her when she wanted to be kissed / you couldn’t be there when she needed you.

10 principles of the Kanga Method

Respect
- your baby,
- yourself and your partner.

Accept
- the fact your life has changed. You wanted it to be changed = you have to adjust your soul to your new life!
- the fact babies know and understand everything, they just not able to express it yet.

Trust
- in your instincts and
- your baby’s instincts.

Loving your baby
- as much as possible
- the way how she/he wants to be loved.

Treat
- your baby as you would want to be treated.

Breastfeeding/Feeding
- your baby with passion and love.

Talking to your baby
- as you would talk to an adult and not as to an idiot.
- as much as you can.

Listen
- to your baby’s signals, because they tell you what are the needs.

Carrying
- your baby on you as long as possible, as much as possible.

Being Flexible
- is the ultimate secret! Be flexible, otherwise you won't survive! :)

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Olga Lipkovics is a baby-wearing and attachment parenting consultant
have a healthier, happier and smarter baby with kangapouch™ !

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Contact Olga
cell: 082 062 0206
email: kanga@kangapouch.co.za
web: www.kangapouch.co.za
blog: www.cryingnomore.com